Reid and McNabb Discuss Giants
It’s that time of week Eagles Nation. Let’s eavesdrop on Andy Reid and Donovan McNabb as they prepare for Sunday night’s NFC East smackdown with Big Blue.
Reid and McNabb are seated in Reid’s office enjoying some Beluga caviar and chilled vodka.
McNabb: This caviar is the bomb, Big Red.
Reid: Yeah, not too shabby. I had Lurie throw in a case with my new contract.
McNabb: That’s bullshit. I asked for some Cristal as part of my new deal and all I got was a month’s supply of Slim Jims.
Reid: Hah, you suck.
McNabb: I can’t disagree.
Reid pats his belly and belches.
Reid: Alright, let’s get down to business. Things are coming together very nicely.
McNabb: Three wins in a row, just like we planned.
Reid: Yes, and Michael Vick is relevant again.
McNabb: I was skeptical about the Vick thing, but you made it work.
Reid: Of course I did. They don’t hand out three-year extensions to morons like Wade Phillips and Norv Turner.
McNabb: Uh, we lost to their teams.
Reid waves his hand dismissively.
Reid: We were supposed to lose to them. C’mon Don, it’s all in the script. Didn’t you read it?
McNabb: I skimmed it.
Reid: Skimmed?
McNabb: Ah, it was the same old crap. I get hurt, we lose to a couple garbage teams, struggle at mid-season, make a December run, yada, yada, yada…
Reid: Yada, yada? This ain’t Seinfeld 5, it’s the NFL. You and I have to be on the same page.
McNabb: I know we’re gonna lose on Sunday. Isn’t that enough?
Reid: No. What if I need you to throw a pick in the fourth quarter?
McNabb: Alright, alright. I’ll read the script again.
Reid: Well, you better. I don’t want you screwin’ up and winning the freakin’ game by accident.
McNabb: Hmm… I dunno, maybe we should win.
Reid stands up and pounds his fists on the desk.
Reid: Don’t you see?! We can’t win! The fans and media must suffer. That’s the way it is in Philly. Do you need a refresher course?
McNabb: Why not flip the script? We win out, finish 12-4. Be one of the teams to beat.
Reid: Crazy talk. Next you’ll be suggesting we win the Super Bowl.
McNabb: Now that you mention it –
Reid: Okay, okay, I gotta put a stop to this lunacy. You’re obviously not getting enough sleep. Must be the new baby at home.
McNabb: Actually, I feel great. Baby has been sleeping through the night.
Reid puts his face in his hands and sighs.
Reid: Let’s call it a day, 5. I gotta see my broker, anyway.
McNabb: Don’t worry, Big Red. I’m confident we’ll flop hard Sunday night.
Reid: I hope so. Can’t have people thinking we’re legit yet.
McNabb: Gotcha. Thanks for the caviar.
Reid: Sure thing. Hey, next week bring some of those Slim Jims with ya. The wife refuses to buy them, but me like spicy meat sticks.
McNabb: Uh, okay, I’ll make a note.
Reid: Yummy in my tummy!











