Reid and McNabb Trim the NovaCare Christmas Tree

Surprise renovations to Reid‘s office caused my hidden microphone to be damaged last week. Boo!! Lucky for me, I have connections over at NovaCare who were able to sneak another one inside. Yay!!!

Time to eavesdrop on one more behind closed doors meeting between Big Red and Donny Mac.

McNabb is standing on a step stool decorating a lovely eight-foot Christmas tree. Reid sits in his leather office chair chewing on a Slim Jim.

Reid: It’s leaning to the left, 5.

McNabb adjusts the star.

McNabb: How’s that look?

Reid: Straight and true… the opposite of your throws versus the Niners.

McNabb: Ha, ha, very funny.

Reid: I got a million of ‘em.

McNabb grabs a decoration with Jeff Garcia’s face on it and shows it to Reid.

McNabb: What the hell is this?

Reid: Ah, it’s leftover from 2006. I had it made special for Jeff.

McNabb: That’s some bullshit. I’ve been here eleven years and don’t have my own ornament.

Reid: You’re still the starting quarterback. What more do you want?

McNabb: Uh, how about a bulb with my smiling face plastered across it?

Reid: Alright, alright, I’ll make a note.

Reid opens a desk drawer to retrieve a notepad. Inside is a red bulb with Kevin Kolb’s face on it. Across the top it reads: “Merry Christmas 2010.” Reid quickly shuts the drawer.

Reid: Er, um, okay. In ’10, you’ll have your very own ornament. It’s a promise.

McNabb: Yes! Man, I can’t wait ’til next Christmas.

Reid (under his breath): Too bad you won’t be here…

McNabb: What was that?

Reid: Nuthin’, just talking to myself.

McNabb gives Reid an odd look.

McNabb: Thought I heard somethin’.

Reid: Nah… let’s talk about this Sunday. Big game. Dawk is back. He’s back, baby!

McNabb: Are we gonna take it easy on him?

Reid opens a bag of Christmas M&M’s and engulfs a handful.

Reid: No way. I’m sending DeSean deep on his old ass all day.

McNabb: The fans might not like that too much.

Reid: Pshaw! Since when have I cared what those morons think?

McNabb: Good point.

Reid: I’m thinking we let him do his thing pregame, then chuck it down his money-grubbing throat.

McNabbb: Hey, can’t blame him for taking the cash.

Reid: The hell I can’t. We proposed a fair contract.

McNabb: Really? Dawk told me you offered him the league minimum and a six month supply of Brita water filters.

Reid: Well, I don’t remember the exact particulars, but I’m pretty sure it was a year’s supply.

McNabb: That’s the worst deal ever.

Reid: Au contraire, my friend. The worst deal ever was the one we gave Corey Simon. A $500 signing bonus and a crate of Hormel Chili.

McNabb: That doesn’t make any sense.

Reid: What can I say, the man loves chili.

McNabb: Whatever. I gotta bolt. Me and O-line are going caroling.

Reid: The O-line?

McNabb: Believe it or not, Todd has the voice of angel.

Reid: He’s got the eyes of a pothead too.

McNabb: And you would know, Drug Daddy.

Reid: Ouch! Not bad, 5.

The two of them high five.

McNabb: Alright, Big Red. Have a wonderful Christmas. Don’t eat too much.

Reid shoves a large candy cane in his mouth.

Reid: What’s that supposed to mean?

McNabb (hiding a chuckle): Nuthin.’

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