Skittles, bro.

Lynch Eats Skittles, Eagles' Season Over After Loss to Seahawks

I could tell you about the piss poor tackling. I could write about Marshawn Lynch’s stupid 15-yard touchdown run that set the tone. I could talk to you about Vince Young in what appeared to be his last game as a starter before hitting free agency looking like a clueless assclown, making terrible throw after terrible throw.

I could write about Andy Reid’s inexplicable refusal to use LeSean McCoy early in the game. I could tell you about Riley Cooper’s two awful, just simply f**** inexcusable drops. I could do all of that.

Or I could go to bed. And dream. You remember that word, right? Dream. What this season was supposed to be. Instead, the nightmare continued Thursday night as the Eagles did exactly what I thought they would do–play uninspired football in a brutal, hideous loss to another inferior opponent. This team is an absolute disgrace. I loathe this roster. Samuel, Asomugha, DRC, Vick, Young, Nate Allen, all of them. It’s a toxic combination of bad and apathetic football players.

I’ve been one of Andy Reid’s staunchest supporters, but I don’t know what else to say at this point. Not only is this team 4-8, but they’ve lost in the most puzzling, baffling and uninspired ways possible. They are a terrible football team. The secondary is atrocious, the linebackers are worse. And the coaching staff looks like bumbling pack of clueless high school coaches in it just to collect a $5,000 paycheck. The schemes make no sense, accountability is non-existent and the execution is laughable.

Nine Bud Light’s have numbed me to the hideousness of what I just watched. It was simply f**** (****** you, FanSided and you’re ******* policies) awful.

Come back tomorrow so we can break this thing down. Although, I’ll tell you–I’d rather buy a portable gasoline tank. Take the nozzle, fill my rectum with gas, light a match next to it and feel my rectum burn. I’d rather light my own ass and it’s insides on fire than discuss this garbage.


We’ll talk about how right I was about this disgraceful performance and how you had to be f***** delusional not to see it from a mile away. Great season. It’s been a joy to be a part of it. Every minute of it.

**** you.

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