It was a typical Monday morning.
I woke up in a bit of a fog, perplexed at how my alarm clock could ring so soon. I stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom, turned on the light and took a piss. Midstream, as my flow veered to the right and hit the toilet seat, I realized what had happened last night was in fact true:
So I took some toilet paper and cleaned up my piss, all while realizing my worst fear had come true. And then I checked out the New York Daily News and saw this front page over to the right here.
What’s the point of this tale, you ask? I guess what I’m trying to tell you is that cleaning my early morning misdirected piss flow off the toilet seat was the best thing that happened to me this morning.
It’s going to be a long two weeks.