Philadelphia Eagles: Will Parks totally butchers a top-five rapper ranking

Will Parks, Philadelphia Eagles (Photo by Abbie Parr/Getty Images)
Will Parks, Philadelphia Eagles (Photo by Abbie Parr/Getty Images) /

Thankfully, they’re Philadelphia Eagles and not label heads.

Some things in life are subjective and about an opinion. That’s why we like sports, isn’t it? It’s fair, and it’s about chance. We can argue about who the better pitcher is, but we can’t debate a one-hundred-mile-per-hour fastball. Either you can throw one or you can’t. Sure, the New England Patriots were the better team in Super Bowl 52 in some people’s eyes, but the Philadelphia Eagles wanted an upset and delivered one.

That’s the point. We love certainty and unpredictability, and sports, especially football, give us that. If only we could bottle things that were provable, like who has the faster 40 time and translate that to other arguments, ones involving music for instance.

We, as Philadelphia Eagles fans, love you Will Parks, but come on man!

Is anyone else missing football terribly? Whether it’s debating the day’s camp talk or seeing weekly segments like ESPN’s C’MON MAN!, there’s a hole in our lives without the NFL, one we hopefully won’t have to endure for much longer.

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C’MON MAN! hasn’t ever tackled some of the music world’s most debatable topics, but maybe it should, starting with major players in hip hop. Recently, newly-added Eagles safety Will Parks listed his top five hip hop artists and the list read like this:

1. Lil Uzi Vert, 2. Meek Mill, 3. Jay-Z, 4. Jeezy, and 5. A$AP Rocky

First, Ronald Darby calls Lil Uzi Vert the next Michael Jackson, and now this. Let’s say it in unison. Come on man! Any lists that places this guy ahead of Jay-Z in anything needs to be thrown out quickly. Yeah, Jeezy is a legend, but that TM:103 Hustlerz Ambition album? Who knows man.

There’s no word on how Parks compiled the said list. For that, you’ll have to speak with him, but let’s be frank here. If we’re talking about the best rappers of all time, there are glaring omissions (The Notorious B.I.G., Nas, Tupac). If we’re talking about the best rappers right now, it’s hard not to wonder why guys like Kendrick Lamar or Drake don’t get the nod over Meek Mill. We love you Meek but come on man!

Then, we can talk about legends. Here’s a history lesson kids. Regardless of who your favorite rapper was, their favorite rapper was probably L.L. Cool J, Rakim, or KRS One. That’s who they were listening to when they were scribbling down a few ideas.

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We love you Will Parks, but it must be said. Here’s a guy that clearly made the right career choice. Sitting on some label’s artists and repertoire roster probably won’t be in his future any time soon. If you’re on social media in the next few days, make sure you give this one the “hashtag LOL” distinction.