No More Games When It Comes To Domestic Violence

As a Philadelphia Eagles fan, I have inherent disdain for the other teams in the NFC East due to the nature of the “game”. Unfortunately the shocking news surrounding New York Giants kicker Josh Brown‘s domestic violence has manifested that disdain into anger, sadness, confusion and apathy towards not just that team, but the NFL as a whole.

I interrupt this day of 15 football games with a clear and concise message: Domestic violence is real and we as a society still have no clue how to act on it. On a day where the Eagles face the Minnesota Vikings in a litmus test of this young team’s prowess, I should be excited for the game ahead. Unfortunately I am not. The events that have transpired in wake of Brown’s actions are unavoidable and I can not remain silent on this issue. This is not just an NFL issue however. This is a societal issue.

My brother was the victim of sexual assault as a child by a school bus driver. My mother was the victim of domestic violence for years at the hands of my (ex) step-father. I will not divulge into details here, but I have made a point on my personal Twitter to tell two different stories of my personal experiences with domestic violence. Obviously, these are sensitive in nature and I must provide a trigger warning for this material. If you have the time, please read them here and here. Again, the material I posted on my Twitter is very sensitive.

I, along with many others, have suffered cognitively and physically with the long-lasting effects of this tragic behavior by sociopaths. There is no cure for victims of domestic violence. The scars left behind on our bodies might heal, but the irreparable damage to our fragile psyches haunts us for life. We can make these situations a teachable moment however. We as a society can do better. We must do better. This is beyond the Eagles, football and sports in general.

Perhaps that is why it’s ironic that 12 days from Halloween delivered the biggest trick of them all to the NFL. When the Kings County Sheriff’s office released mind-numbing information about Brown’s behavior, it dealt one more crack in the false facade of a shield used by the NFL. During the course of his administration, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell has reiterated the word “integrity” more times than I can count. Is integrity the right word when you give paid leave to a psychopath like Brown?

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There is very little integrity at 345 Park Avenue. The NFL shares a building with companies such as The Blackstone Group and Deutsche Bank, where power and financial results rule the roost. Goodell has stumbled and bumbled more times than Chris Berman on NFL Primetime on issues of domestic violence. The 32 owners of NFL franchises, Jeffrey Lurie included, have his back as long as profits remain at all-time highs.

Since 2000, NFL players have been arrested for domestic violence 108 times. We all remember the situations involving Ray Rice and Greg Hardy. Since Hardy’s arrest, there have been 12 different domestic violence arrests involving NFL players. One of those situations involved this year’s favorite fantasy football sleeper Quincy Enunwa. Little attention was paid to that arrest and subsequent four game suspension as Enunwa was on the New York Jets’ practice squad. Yesterday’s villian has become today’s hero. In the event that Brown regains his place on the Giants’ roster, how many fantasy football owners will cheer loudly when he kicks a 40-yard field goal?

Next: The Eagles Will Show Their True Colors Against The Vikings

In the fall of 2014, the NFL and the Joyful Heart Foundation began a public service announcement campaign entitled, “NO MORE“. Eagles fan favorite Jon Dorenbos was just one of the players to participate in that campaign. Dorenbos himself was a victim of senseless violence in his household. Others included former Eagle, and current NFL executive vice president, Troy Vincent along with another former Eagle, James Thrash. It also included current Giants quarterback Eli Manning.

"“Domestic violence and sexual assault are difficult topics to talk about. It’s time to start the conversation. No more excuses. No more silence. No more violence”"

The aforementioned quote is pulled directly from Eli’s campaign poster. Unfortunately for domestic violence victims, Manning’s message this week has been excuses, silence, and apathy towards violence. He wants the perception of caring, but when push comes to shove he has chosen the path of least resistance. Manning is supposed to be a team leader. Leaders should make difficult and unpopular decisions for the betterment of the collective unit. Manning is not alone however.

No more is not a catchphrase for PR purposes. It’s a way of life. This extends beyond football. Aroldis Chapman will pitch in the World Series less than a year after committing a heinous act of violence against his girlfriend. Chapman was suspended by the MLB for 30 games. If the Chicago Cubs win the World Series, Chapman will be revered instead of reviled. No more. Management and leadership needs to take a stand against this behavior.

The trickle down effect of Giants’ leadership starts at the very top of the organization. It starts with owner John Mara. Mara’s remarks about Brown thus far have infuriated many, including the mother of rookie cornerback Eli Apple. Head coach Ben McAdoo also tows the company line. Consider the fact that McAdoo was almost the head coach of the Eagles. Mara and McAdoo personify cowardice and apathy. They “are not going to turn their back” on Brown. Instead, they have decided to turn their back on his victim. This has been the team motto this week. Defend and deflect is the Giants’ way.

It's one thing to like someone or even a team. It's a whole other thing to cosign the bullsh*t. Don't cosign the bull.
— Annie Apple (@SurvivinAmerica) October 20, 2016

Players on other teams are choosing to be more reactive with their words. Perhaps the most notable critic has been Steve Smith Sr. As the NY Post mentions however, why didn’t Smith bring the same vitriol towards his former teammates that committed equal atrocities? Eagles receiver Jordan Matthews has questioned the integrity of the NFL and their disciplinary process. This is a good start, but it raises the question: Why aren’t the most prominent NFL players speaking out against this issue when they did so against Colin Kaepernick?

Remember when Drew Brees felt compelled to speak out against Kaepernick?

"“Listen, if I chose to speak out on every issue that I have an opinion about, that’s all I’d do all day. I’d probably have a hundred Twitter posts a day. But this one …,” Brees said without completing his thought."

Brees opted to speak for patriotism while he’s been silent for domestic violence. In 2010, Louisiana – where Brees plays football – ranked 4th in the nation in femicide. Perhaps it’s ironic that a vast majority of NFL locker rooms are silent on the very locker room talk that presidential nominee Donald Trump spoke about. The moral outrage that centered on Trump was not solely focused on his words, but his actions as well. The actions of Brown and the words of Trump are one and the same. This is a time where the game needs to take a back seat. Pink cleats and towels are not addressing this issue.

On average, nearly 20 people per minute are physically abused by an intimate partner in the United States. The average NFL game is just over three hours and nine minutes. That means, on average, that approximately 3,780 victims will suffer during each game today. The first game that kicks off Week 7? The Giants and Los Angeles Rams. We as fans need to say “no more.” We need our teams to say “no more.” It starts with each and every one of us, myself included. Not just today while this story is fresh in our minds, but from now until eternity. We as a society need both our words and our actions to say, “NO MORE.”

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