Former Eagles star proves the fountain of youth is far from mythical
We've figured it out. There's an alien spaceship or some sort of fountain of youth at The NovaCare Complex (or both). There has to be. There's no other explanation. How is it possible that all of these freaks of nature venture in and out of the Philadelphia Eagles organization if we're wrong about what we're saying?
In recent years, we have seen Brandon Brooks destroy notions of what his timetable to return from injury should be. Lane Johnson played in a Super Bowl with a serious abductor tear. Sydney Brown ruptured an ACL on January 7. He's already out of a walking boot.
We know humans have evolved and seen medical advancements, but we need some of what the Eagles' doctors give them. Look around, and you'll learn former Eagles are also aging backward.
Everyone probably already knows who we're talking about, right?
Former Eagles WR Terrell Owens releases a new workout video, proving he's still in phenomenal shape.
He's known by two letters, 'T.O.'. Terrell Owens is the prototype from which other freaks of nature are birthed. Six-foot-three.. Somewhere around 224 pounds in his playing days... The Pro Football Hall of Fame inductee turns 51 years old on December 7th. He doesn't look a day over 18.
As part of an ongoing joke that his been going on with his friend Shannon Sharpe, he released a workout video to prove he still has some tread on the tire.
DAMM… 50-YEAR-OLD TERRELL OWENS PUT OUT A FULL YT VIDEO OF HIM PLAYING FOOTBALL TO PROVE SHANNON SHARPE HE’s STILL GOT IT
— MLFootball (@_MLFootball) June 27, 2024
💀💀💀 @terrellowens still got 700 yards & 5 tuddies in him for next season pic.twitter.com/X4HCLPJrx4
Yeah... At this point, we have seen enough. We have enunciated our theories about this man's ability to defy Father Time so often that, at this point, we're beginning to run out of superlatives.
Watch the full video from STEVE JR MEDIA's YouTube channel below! And, try not to do what we did, ask yourselves questions about why he and Donovan McNabb couldn't have gotten along better.
Yep! The fountain of youth's waters certainly run through Eagles headquarters. The next time there's a practice session open to the media, we'll make sure we look around to see if we can find it! We may even attempt to take a drink ourselves. All of those vitamins we're taking don't seem to be working.