Matchups and predictions for the Eagles NFC East Rivals in Week 5 of the 2023 NFL season

  • The Eagles are kings who stay Kings
  • The Giants are embarrassing
  • The Commanders might be good, but not good enough
  • This week marks the official start of Dak's interception era
Daniel Jones, New York Giants
Daniel Jones, New York Giants / Sarah Stier/GettyImages
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The San Francisco 49ers and the Dallas Cowboys

This is one of those Sunday Night Football games that you hope has three total points scored and no one has any fun. If anyone wins this game, we as a society, are the losers. Who’s ready to cheer for the least amount of offensive production in the 2023 season? We sure are. 

This will be short, because no one cares about either of these teams and we want nothing but the worst for either of them.

Cowboys offense versus 49ers defense

This game comes down to whether or not the Dallas Cowboys can run the ball. Aside from the pathetic, sad, laughable, and pitiful loss to the lowly Arizona Cardinals, Dallas' rushing attack has done whatever it wants. They’ve been cranking out 111.8 rushing yards per game and another 218.8 yards through the air.

Even though they are seeing decent production, they are absolute dog water in the red zone. The Eagles’ Red Zone production has been lackluster, but the Cowboys are even worse. According to, they’re ranked 30th in scoring percentage, with only 36.84% of their trips having ended in a touchdown.

In the last three games (that means we’re excluding the Week 1 ‘game’ they played against the Giants) they’re getting touchdowns from Red Zone trips just 26.67% of the time. That's absolutely atrocious.

As for San Fran’s defense, we know they’re good. They’re allowing just 66 rushing yards per game. A lot of that is due to them being up by so many points that the opposing teams can't afford to waste time running the ball, so that number is skewed. They are however allowing only 235.3 passing yards per game.

They’re a good defense who benefits from their offense playing bully-ball. If the Cowboys are going to move the rock in this game, it’s going to be because of quarterback Dak Prescott’s arm, and NO ONE believes that he has the capability of winning versus a good defense.

This game should mark the beginning of Dak’s interception season. The 49ers figure to be efficient.